"Get Lost"

Running along the beach at Milford on Auckland's North Shore every morning, I see a few older men walking very small dogs. Some of those pooches sport pink collars and some of those collars are studded with diamantine beads. Milford is that type of suburb. Have you noticed how the more "bling" the dog wears, the more stooped, grumpy and hopeless the old chap on the other end of the leash looks? I can't help but imagine that each of those unfortunate (and presumably once powerful) men still has the words, "Get lost!", reverberating through his neural synapses.

You can almost hear the conversation.´

She: "What are you doing today, dear?"

He (grumpy): "Dunno."

She: (lips pursed): "Well, I've got the girls coming round for coffee. Why don't you take Jewel out for a walk on the beach? Do take your time, dear. You know what the doctor said about how good exercise is for your heart."

What's the wife really saying?  "Get lost, dear."

And that's basically what my wife Rosa is saying to me.

The irony is not lost on me. I want to get lost. I like getting lost. Great things can happen when you cast loose the usual moorings of your wretched little existence and try something so off-the-wall it makes you curl your toes in the shower and go, "Aaarrgh! What am I doing!"

However, just because I want to get lost, doesn't mean Rosa should want it as well.

Unfortunately, she does.

And I know why. We've spent far too long on our last audio project, "Step Into Nature's Therapy Room". We're very satisfied with the result but now we need some space.

I heard her talking to her sister on the telephone. "Oh, he'll be fine," she says. "And between you and me, I'm thrilled. I can get on with what I want to do."

Today, she came home from the Takapuna Sunday Markets with a huge bunch of white roses she had bought for herself.

"Because I wanted to," she said.

And, she's painted her toenails.

"Because they look nice," she told me.

I called the shade, 'Get Lost Pink'.

She laughed, "Don't be silly! Let's call it, 'Keep It Fresh!'"

I love this woman and always will. However, it's time for me to get lost and take a long refreshing walk.